(Photo above by Daria Obymaha / Pexels)
I don’t think I’ll ever get over you. In the words of Jacob Collier’s new album, heartbreak can be the realest, most crushing experience. But we’re here to say that it doesn’t have to be. In fact, by practicing Buddhism, it can even be the reason you see your self-worth more than before.
How is that possible? Well, Buddhism exists for the happiness of all people. We each have within us an abundance of wisdom, grit, courage and compassion, enough to overcome any challenge in life. We call this our Buddhability or Buddha nature.
Buddhism exists for the happiness of all people. We each have within us an abundance of wisdom, grit, courage and compassion, enough to overcome any challenge in life.
However, believing in ourselves each day can be quite a challenge. This teaching, that we have Buddhahood or Buddhability within, is found in the Lotus Sutra and is expressed by chanting the phrase Nam-myoho-renge-kyo.
Shakyamuni Buddha, or Siddhartha as he is sometimes referred to, preached the Lotus Sutra according to his own enlightenment so that all people could access the enlightenment in their own lives too.
So, what can we do to rebuild our self-esteem after a breakup? By chanting Nam-myoho-renge-kyo, we can experience the inherent worth of our lives and all those around us.
The Buddhist philosopher Daisaku Ikeda offers advice for dealing with a broken heart:
I’m sure quite a few among you have had your hearts broken or been badly hurt and perhaps felt unable to go on, your self-esteem in tatters. But you must never believe that you are worthless. There is no substitute for you, who [is] more precious than all the treasures in the universe. … It is crucial that you become strong. If you are strong, even your sadness will become a source of nourishment, and the things that make you suffer will purify your lives. Only when we experience the crushing, painful depths of suffering can we begin to understand the true meaning of life. Precisely because we have experienced great suffering, it is imperative that we go on living. The important thing is to keep moving forward. If each of you uses your sadness as a source of growth, you will become a person of greater depth and breadth—an even more wonderful you.
Discussions on Youth, p. 69
Ikeda continues about how we can chant in those moments:
Whether we are happy, sad or suffering, if we chant honestly to the Gohonzon with the feelings in our hearts, our lives will naturally proceed in the best direction.
Discussions on Youth, p. 69
Practicing Buddhism and chanting Nam-myoho-renge-kyo is the perfect remedy for a broken heart. Not only that, but our ability to overcome our own problems can give hope to others in similar circumstances.
Speaking of being inspired, you can listen to Faith Jones, whose journey with Buddhism is intertwined with her relationship experience. Practicing Buddhism helped her identify a tendency to seek happiness based on external validation, not only in relationships but also at work and in other situations.
She shares her story today, which is filled with so many practical insights, applicable to relationships of all kinds.